I hate Sunday nights – I try to squeeze as much time out of them as I can so that Monday morning won’t get here too quickly. I can remember feeling the same way about it when I was young and going to high-school (well the few times I went) – Tonight, I am stretching out the time by sitting at my computer looking to see who has won an Oscar. I was mainly interested in Colin Firth (who wouldn’t be? ) but just looking at the list of glitzy names, it made me reflect on my life and that of the elite Hollywood crowd. This morning, while I rustled up scrambled eggs, dressed to kill (or maim) in black sweatpants, my husband’s Henley shirt (mine are too tight) and a lime green hair scrunchie, the Hollywood crowd were getting massages, pedis, mani’s and having their skin tightened up with egg-whites, Preparation’ H’ or whatever the hell they use. When I sauntered off to WalMart to purchase some groceries, and then stopped on the way home at Lowe’s to buy manure for our garden, I imagine they were nibbling on their lunches – a dandelion stalk and a grape chaser. At 1pm, our clan sat down to fat hamburgers off the grill, red wine and Cheetos, while the ‘In-Crowd’ were taking a quick beauty nap. As we ate key lime pie, those icons of ours sat patiently being anointed with make-up, having hair coiffed and then dressed in designer outfits that were not purchased from TJ Maxx. Isn’t it amazing how life is meted out to one and all? That some of us might have become something else if we had changed one thing in our lives. Perhaps applied for a job we didn’t bother with, or talk to someone that we weren’t interested in, or missed a plane, caught the wrong bus, all manner of things that could have changed the paths of our lives. Who would want the glamour life? Hah! Why would I want that when instead I can spend an evening with my partner, holding hands while we watch ‘Indiana Jones’? It is great to be able to get out of bed only 30 minutes after I have gotten into it (he is snoring) and go to this computer and type these words. Why would I want to change the way things are when the alarm goes off tomorrow at 5 a.m. and I remember I have to start the new diet so that I don’t have to go on another medication? Hollywood? Who needs it when I can drive the highway with the other poor souls, as we scurry to get to offices that are small boxes inside big boxes, where we spend another eight/nine hours staring at small electronic boxes. Nope, not me – let me just tell you that I wouldn’t change my ordinary life for one of those lives in Hollywood, no sirree bob – the only egg white that I will ever get on my face will be cooked and on the way to my mouth. Preparation ‘H’ will never go near my body, unless I am physically restrained by a doctor, and I will never be less than 150 pounds…..unless I lose a limb. Happy Monday all – and congratulations to Colin (or Mr. Darcy) – we Brits are proud of you mate! Jude the sleepy
