What is the deal with men and growing vegetables?

Women can give birth to a new human being, and a man might cry one tear and feel fullfilled as the head of a family. But a man that can produce a squash, a spinach head or a tomato becomes the Alpha, the bull of the herd, he can barely stop himself talking, bragging about the size of his produce!

I have been working hard in the yard planting flowers. I currently have no nails, but the jagged pieces left on the stubs of my fingers could grow potatoes. Oh but the fruits of my labours are obvious…..colours of the rainbow and nectar filled blossoms that tempt the hummingbirds to sip. Yet my husband is blind to the beauty of the flowerbeds. His eyes, his very soul is embedded within that mound of manure-ridden, compost smelling pile of dirt where he births his veggies. They, and they alone rule his heart!

I watch him gaze lovingly at the garden, I see his hands gently pluck a squash from within the tangle of it’s stems and leaves. He holds the veggie tenderly, and pride shines from his eyes. He sighs with emotion. I am no fool, I know when I have met my match.

I start using lotion with the fragrance of cucumbers and melons. I rinse my hair in coconut conditioner, I use fruity lip balm….all to no avail….the veggies have me beaten. I am forgotten until the end of the season. Perhaps once the harvest is in, he will find time for me once more…….well, until Football Season starts…… later Jude the Forgotten.

*Sorry for the lack of posts last week. Unfortunately my real life was so busy I had no free time to compose. Apologies ladies!!!